Old Boyfriend Syndrome

I have one old boyfriend. We dated our freshman year, he went on a mission and I gave him the option to stop my wedding, he said “go ahead, get married.” So — I did. I actually saw him at the temple the day I got my endowments out. It was VERY weird.

Anyway, I basically forgot about him, until recently.

He married a very popular LDS singer. I see her stuff everywhere (and by everywhere, I mean in the Seagull Book and Tape ad) and it’s just interesting to wonder what his life is like now (and I swear that he made fun of Janice Kapp — I do an amazing “I Walk By Faith” — right along with me back in our day).

Then is the dichotomy. I’d love to have him on my facebook — just to see what he’s doing, etc. Or even just a quick email to say that it must be exciting that they’re doing so well. But I don’t. Held back by my own constraints.

And let’s face it — that’s fairly rare.

Anyway, is your old boyfriend anything special now? (I did look him up on the BYU Alumni site — it looks like he graduated in accounting, so most likely his life is not that exciting….) Do you keep in contact with them? Are you forced to see each other frequently? I am guessing many of you have more than 1, which would complicate things further.

Honestly, though. Sometimes the thought of having to find a new spouse keeps me married. :) You know, every little bit helps. :) Random blog, I know.

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Comments

  1. says

    I ran in to mine once in Sears in Provo (I was living out of state by this time)… his wife was hugely pregnant and I was in the midst of infertility woe’s. It was hard and awkward… mostly because of how horrible I felt about myself and my inability to reporduce. It was good to see him (could have done without the pregnant wife though).

    Anyway thanks to BYU alumni I could email him if I wanted to. Don’t want to. But I could.

    P.S. I’d like to think that I’ve aged better than his wife thankyouverymuch.

    P.P.S. Don’t you wish all old boyfriends had a blog that you could read???

  2. says

    I guess it all depends on how your relationship ended. I don’t keep in contact at all with my old boyfriend and since my parents moved away from Ohio, I don’t ever happen to “run into him.” I think it would be weird to keep in touch with him, but I think because of our whole “dear John” situation. That’s just me.

  3. says

    Hmmm. I say look him up on facebook. Why not? Sounds as if you were amicable enough. :)

    There are some I probably would and one I definitely wouldn’t.

    But, that’s the end of it. Don’t think it’s too appropriate to really keep in contact with an old boyfriend, either, KWIM?

  4. Anonymous says

    I got back in touch with mine a year or so ago, and rather wish I hadn’t. He was a Born-again Christian at the time I dated him (I know, I’m a heathen), and since then he’s gotten into “non-religious spirituality.” Long story, but it’s creeped me out. Guess the positive thing is that it really made me appreciate Will and his priesthood and the wonderful, sane person that he is. –Gretel

  5. says

    I actually found my old boyfriend’s wife’s blog! We know common people. I lurk there every once in a while. His wife looks a lot like me, we both raise boys, we even have the same couches and pajamas for our kids at Christmas! Looks like he just found a replacement for me when I wouldn’t marry him instead of go on a mission.

    He’s also bald now and I don’t find him attractive in the least. But he’s a good guy and his wife seems really cool. sometimes I wish I could comment on the blog and say that I’m happy for them and their life and that I’m happy in mine.

    I’m always interested to see what old friends/boyfriends are up to, but I’m with lara, I don’t think it’s really appropriate to be in contact. But what do I know….

    Seriously weird that you saw him on your endowment day….weird!

  6. says

    Hey – first of all welcome back and I am super jealous of your trip! Looks like you had fun. Well my first boyfriend turned out to be a film director who lives in LA now. But when I started communicating with him did not go over to well with hubby even though we dated AGES ago! So that was that!

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