Tuesday, June 30, 2009

The One Where I Complain About Working

You know, I look at P and think "I wanted this, I wanted it for so long and now look at what my life has become."
Same thing at work -- I really wanted to go back at this time, so I can take my other leave in the fall -- and it will totally work better that way but it doesn't mean that I don't look longingly at the other side of the fence. I'm excessively tired. I work at 7 am most days and combine that with a baby at 3 am fairly often....
well, tired is just the best word to describe myself right now.
Well "really-wanting-yumi-yogurt" also describes me -- but I don't think we can really call that a "word", can we?
In other news P has reflux and is not in the mood to eat sometimes. It makes me tired, and my ears hurt with the screaming.

Sunday, June 28, 2009

2 Months Tomorrow!


Where does time go?


I'll tell you -- it goes into cleaning, work, photography, reading books, playing legos, doing lessons, rarely taking naps, running errands, figuring out grocery lists, etc, etc, etc.


In reality I should just sit and stare at her, watch each little change. I love her so. And yes, I did make her giant poof-ball headband. Clap if you wish.

Saturday, June 27, 2009

Photos from the Blessing

Here's some pictures of P in her blessing dress, with our family etc. I love that one in the middle and the other one above it -- she looks so darn dainty. That's just not something we see much around here!

Friday, June 26, 2009

I am a Fragile Flower

I fear that the blog may be a bit lax this summer. Not only do I have nothing to say but the time to say it is very small...
For, you see... I am a working machine. On average, in the year prior to becoming disabled I probably worked two or three times a month. I am now working 3 or 4 times a WEEK. Serious. I haven't worked this much since I started L&D 8 years ago. There are many benefits to this:

1. Sometimes I do think my skills get a little lax because I do work so little. This will definitely be a time to refine them. Sharp as a knife I will be.
2. Money. Duh. I don't want to work much in the fall because P is still so little and I don't want her being drug to school very often. I also hate my couch, and my kids want to go to Disneyland.
3. I remember that Drew also has a crappy gig going to work day in and day out. I will be ready to play mom once the summer comes to a close.

So, I am sure I will have a nice story to share (for instance, I heard we had a patient who thought she could choose "which hole" the baby was going to come out of -- and no, I am totally not kidding) every now and then but don't fear that I've slipped into a postpartum coma. It's a work one instead. :)

Thursday, June 25, 2009

A Shopping frenzy

We still had a few bucks left in our clothing alotment for the month, so I took Conner to Kid to Kid to buy some shorts. I was worried we woudn't find anything as he's older and we all know older kids like to RUIN things (especially boys). He got 2 pair for around 6 bucks (sweet). I also found some swim shirts for the boys, some trumpette socks for Miss P (I was considering paying 30 bucks for these a few weeks ago -- and now I got 2 sets for about 10 bucks), and a couple of other things.

Anyway, I'm surprised more of you haven't gone. Or, maybe you have... Or, maybe I just don't have any issues buying used because we did it a lot when Conner was little. Either way I will keep stepping in every time I go to Safeway (btw, they have a 20% off coupon on their June email if you sign-up online).

You can still save 3 bucks on your purchase if you give them my name.

Oh, and TLC wrote back. Just said they took my comments VERY seriously and they'd forward them on to program directing. Really, I hope TLC at least comes to their senses and realizes that this family needs to be done with the public eye.

I also went to the dentist today and I didn't scream at all. Just in my head. :)

Wednesday, June 24, 2009

Doable

Drew and I did a budget revision recently because our household budget was just ludicrous and we were over-spending because there was no way we could stay under what I had allotted.

So, for the past month we've been listing things that we "need" on the white board and today was the day to go make that purchase. We'd even prioritized them so if we were heading to the top of our budget we could get the things we most needed.

It was liberating to get to the end of our list and realize we still had money left over and we were able to get the kids a bouncy ball. Feel the joy. We also almost forgot P. You know, priorities {sigh}.

Anyway, I had a talk with Conner about budgeting on Sunday and then I had a similar talk with a co-worker yesterday. I think that most people feel like their budget is such a personal thing, when in reality it's something we should talk more about how we can better save, not spend and be happy.

Because as Kate told us on her show on Monday we're all just looking for peace. I am now going to write my letter to TLC to beg them to stop filming and terminate their contract. Really, if any contract should be null and void, it's that one. You can write an email too.

Tuesday, June 23, 2009

Bu-bye hospital

No, I'm not quitting my job.
I'm DONE going to the doctor so freaking much! I never used to go to the doctor, and now I'm racking-up co-pays like they're stickers at the scrapbook store.
My final appt. is this next wednesday with the urologist about my kidney CT scan (which was this AM). It's just to look for more kidney stones, and even if they're there I have no idea what they're gonna have to say to me about them.
{dumb}
Anyway, now that I'm done being disabled I look forward to being a normal person who's not on a first name basis with the receptionists at each clinic.

Monday, June 22, 2009

I AM SO DANG MAD

Just saw that Jon and Kate are filing for divorce.
They disgust me.
How Kate can says she's doing this all for her kids is beyond me. Do people not realize that the BEST thing you can give your kids is a happy marriage?
I was hoping against hope that they'd go to counseling and get it together, but it seems like the show has driven a wedge between them.
I was thinking (as I was putting fertilizer on my lawn this AM) about how Kate was so pro-organic when the show first came out, and I was thinking about how people spend extra money to go organic, which is fine. But I wish people would realize that having a happy home is the THE most important thing.
THE.
MOST.
IMPORTANT.
Now little Aidan will be a drug dealer, and there's probably a likely chance the courts decide to split the kids up... I mean, really -- can 8 kids be raised by one person? Is it even safe?
Does anyone see a "Parent trap" sequel?
Nope, neither do I?
In Jon's defense I think that Kate is mean and harsh, and I do see a bit of myself in her and actually I think I've learned to be a better wife watching her pick him apart.
But, currently I hate both of them.
and now as I read all of this on the Internet about how their kids will be happier now that they're split (and possibly that's true because if they stayed in the zone of hating each other that isn't helpful), I think we need to focus that they are NOT in this for their kids. They're in it for themselves. period.
And TLC is in it for THEMselves, and I am going to write them a little note and say so.

A Word of Wisdom

Many of you know that LDS people don't drink alcohol, tea or coffee and we don't smoke (or do illicit drugs). But Why?

Yesterday we had a lesson on the word of wisdom and it got me thinking.

Personally, I think the word of wisdom is a reminder to not do things that are addicting, or harmful to our bodies and to try and only put things into our bodies that are good for us. Heavens knows I don't always do this (I think I had pie for breakfast a couple of times last week), but I think it's great council for everyone.

But, then we were at friends house last night and they reminded me that we all have "addictions" in our lives, and most of it doesn't have to do with food/beverage. I was thinking I'd list my "addictions"
1. Blogging, and computers in general
2. Email (honestly, it needs its own line -- my email is always up).
3. Food storage (Drew found-out that I have possibly near 400 little tablets of dishwasher soap -- 200 of which were bought last week, and let's not even go into how many bottles of water we have)
4. Food (I've been on a sweets craze since the baby)
5. DVR
I think that's all I can think of right now. But, I've been challenging myself to give up the computer a bit every week -- just to remind myself that it is/can become an addiction, and it's something I can let go of. My obsession with bargain shopping has taken a backseat since I had P. I am also working on eating consciously this week. It's time to get slim, dang it!

Anyway, it's a good thing to look at your life and see what you're "addicted" to and how it's affecting you, and try to resist them in general. It's a word to all the wise.

Saturday, June 20, 2009

FYI

Little computer issue.
Going to take the weekend off computers, I think we're going to have to do the whole system restore, but thankfully we have an external hardrive that I am currently copying our old one too.
No pictures lost.
Phewsh.
Until then....

Friday, June 19, 2009

So Much and So Little

This morning I did 30 day Shred with Julienne from the Biggest Loser. I am officially shredded, it's super sad. I thought I was going to die during the workout (there's jumping jacks in this workout -- and my belly was shakin' ALL over the place). BUT, it's only 20 minutes long and I think it will be a goodie... short and intense is best for me right now. I have to tell myself that while I'm doing the intense part. :)

Conner had a check-up today, he's on the short side, but he fits right in with all our asian friends. All is well.

P also had a check-up today. All is well with her. She's in the 86th% for length and near the 50th on weight (10# 7 oz). Got some zantac for some reflux I suspect she has. SO nice that doctors don't fight giving it out anymore. She just screams while she eats and that's no fun for any of us. She also got the big first shots. MAN, that's ugly. They've never felt such pain -- in their whole lives. Poor, poor little princess P.

I got like 30 yards of stretch lace (assorted kinds, don't worry) in the mail today. Hello, headbands.

In other news, we got some news that reminds us how you never know what's around the bend and you need to love all the minutes you have with each other. Nothing with us, but it's still making me rack my brain about how to help out. Oh, and I'm back to work tomorrow, if Drew calls any of you crying -- please help him out.

Tuesday, June 16, 2009

Look how FIRM I am

I did the firm today. To me they are the ultimate workout. No whiney cardio stuff, just tons of lunges, heavy upper body, and their fanny lifting leg presses. And some of the time they combine all of those
Yeesh.
I only did a 1/2 hour tape... I hope I don't regret it tomrorow.
I am SO tired right now.
I want to sleep, but it's not a nap day... so instead i write an insanely boring blog.
And you're welcome.

Monday, June 15, 2009

Work that Out

Today was my first workout in just about 7 weeks.

It wasn't pretty, and I did the Lindsay Brinn Mommy bootcamp, and when I heard her voice I almost cried. I was SO tired of the 3rd trimester DVD by the end.

My plan is to do 1 day each of yoga, Lindsay Brinn/Jillienne's "Shred" and the Firm.

I hope I don't die.

Lindsay's big on the core. I thought I was going to split in two when I was doing it. I'm pretty sure I'm a lot skinnier already.

Maybe just thinking about it my tummy is getting smaller...

Sunday, June 14, 2009

The Blessed Event

I flipped through the old scrapbooks this morning.

Looked at Conner's blessing* day. Almost all family who helped to bless them, including lots of extended family. Had a big lunch with all of them afterwards. It was a great day.

Looked at Spencer's blessing day. Once again, a fair amount of family and the bishopric (Drew was ward clerk at the time). Did a luncheon just for family afterwards, and then an egg hunt (it was on Easter). Again, a very fun day.

And here we are today. Very little family, but amazing friends who support us like family and we are so grateful to have. We're having a dessert party tonight. It's most everything I couldn't eat while I was pregnant. Yummm, dig in. ;) With our friends we are sure to have a super fun evening (probably too fun).

This week I'll be taking P out for her only "professional" pictures at JCPenny. Will they be better than what I take at home? Umm... no. They will, however, be the "look" that the other 2 had in their blessing outfits.

It just struck me how we try to do things the "same" with the subsequent children. It's not as if anything else in our life is the same, but we try to keep theirs just like it was with an only child. But, part of that is good. It keeps the tradition, and it keeps my walls with their adorable little faces looking down at me, all tiny and new -- with that lovely JCPenny backdrop.

Today P, we will bless you, like you bless us every day. It's great to take a day and realize her whole life is in front of her. To realize that Heavenly Father is trusting us with her. To realize how blessed we all are. What a blessing.

* For our non-member friends out there, our church doesn't do a "christening" or "baptism" at birth (we do baptisms at age 8), the fathers did give the babies a "name and a blessing" at church -- they are usually blessed with things like making good choices, being married in the temple, loving their family, etc. It's not a requisite ordinance but it's kind of way for the ward to welcome the baby into the world. Pretty low-key, all things considered. Men who hold the priesthood are able to participate. My parents are here, and we've invited a few close friends to help out.

Friday, June 12, 2009

Last Day!

Drew's been counting down since before P was born... and the happy day has finally come. It's the last day of school! This means I'll have a husband home, and I get set to go off and conquer the world of nursing myself.

We've had such a great year. Although I haven't been quite as effusive about Conner's 3rd grade teacher (because I fear some of his other teachers have found it mildly creepy -- although they never comment, and I bet deep down inside they love it -- and frankly, they can just stop reading if they find it THAT creepy...), I have really enjoyed her. The past 3 years we've had young teachers who are so enthusiastic about teaching and they love their jobs. I love that they love it. I enjoy my job but my enthusiasm for it doesn't compare to theirs.

We always do an end of year present for C's teacher, but it just doesn't seem to hold a candle to all they've done through the year. Yes, I know it's their job and they do get paid but it's such a personal thing that they do, they're helping my child. A 25 dollar gift card just doesn't seem to do it... so to all you teachers out there, I hope you enjoy your summer!

On another note, next time I drop off at school I'll be taking 2. When did Spencer get that big?

Thursday, June 11, 2009

Stickin' to the plan

Babywise moms (and dads) tell me about your "night"? You know, the one where your sweet little bundle of joy slept through. P has been getting up between 2:30 and 3:30 almost every night since she was born and somehow I just can't envision how it will happen. I can't remember what the other boys did. Did they just increase the time they were sleeping, or did they just sleep all night once? I think I'm getting old.

But perhaps hearing some of your stories will give me new hope. Thanks so much!

6 weeks




No smiling shots, LOTS of yawning ones though. The bottom 2 are my favorites. She always makes the "o" face, and I just love the bottom right. Very much my life right now.
Oh, and yes, I did make the bow. And no, I will not make you one. They are ugly to make.

The Party's Over

The fat lady has sung, on my disability.

Apparently, Tuesday was my last day of disability. Don't worry I'm still as disabled as before, I'm just not getting paid for it. ;) However, I do plan to take my family leave during marching band season. I am guessing that working evening shift is going to take its toll on me, not to mention marching band taking its own toll... I won't have much toll left to give my kids. Heavens knows they take their toll first.

Just wanted to give a shout out to the disability system. When I had Conner I didn't get anything, and in fact I think I went back to work at 5 weeks post partum because we were running out of funds (me and my 4th degree episiotomy, how sad is that?). Much of my time at home was spent worrying about money and how we were going to stretch ourselves so that I could stay at home and recoup. In CA you get 6 weeks disability after delivery (and I actually ended-up getting 2 months before, although you're only supposed to get 4 weeks if you have a normal pregnancy -- mine was anything but normal), plus 6 weeks of paid family leave after that (if your employer allows it). I will just say it was a huge help to us, and I'm grateful for it.

In other news I need to keep taking pictures of P. She's starting to smile more and I'm a HUGE fan of that. It's on my to do list. Get excited.

Wednesday, June 10, 2009

How do you know that you KNOW

2 boxes of baby boy clothes and a giant bag of them sit in my garage. They stare at me each time I get into my car. The idea was they'd go to a friend who's having a little boy soon (2 girls, now a boy -- she's my opposite). Have I taken them? No. I just can't bring myself to.

I mean, I'm just millimeters from "certain" that we are done. I'd put myself in the "pretty dang well-rootin'-tootin' sure that we are done" category... but we all know how cheap I am and the thought of buying all new baby boy clothes would put me over the edge. Anyway, I talked to a friend and she said to just hold out a few of my favorites and send the rest. I can't keep my garage hostage because I am millimeters from being sure. I did that this AM, and truth be told, most of them aren't in that great of shape. I ended-up with a fairly large box for her, and the rest are going to DI because they are stained, etc. Plus, Conner is 8 years old. Let's not pretend that baby clothes haven't come a long way in those 8 years. I found about 5 outfits that I want to keep, and that makes me happy.

But, how do you "know". I mean, I don't think that now's the time to make any decisions -- that's why our state makes you sign tubal ligation papers 6 weeks in advance of your delivery. I totally agree with that (plus, let me just say that tubal ligation is a permanent procedure, I've had so many friends say "you can just reverse it if you decide you want another one -- but no, you can't, I mean -- people have, and it's worked but you need to go into a procedure involving "snipping" thinking you are DONE -- D-O-N-E- done -- just my little soapbox of the entry). I am only 33 (I know, I look about 50 lately -- it's my lack of will to apply concealer under my eyes). However, I didn't start having kids at 24 so that I could drag it out til' I'm 40. I wanted to be a young mom and so far so good.

Anyway, I know some of you have decided for sure. Did you ever feel "sure" or you just kinda took that leap? I know people who "knew" they were done. But, I can't even decide what to buy at Kid to Kid when I'm there... how can I decide this? Give me your secrets ladies.

BTW, went to Kid to Kid yesterday, just on my way to Ross. I needed something to hold a diaper, and wipes in the church bag... I was fumbling on Sunday while P screamed her head off... it'd be nice to just grab and go. Anyway, I thought I'd just make one from a placemat I'd buy at Ross but I found a JJ Cole diaper clutch at Kid to Kid for only $4.25 (retail's 17 bucks on those, I think -- and this one has a tiny crease that you can hardly see -- otherwise looks brand new). Ross didn't even have decent placemats to use, so I'm glad for Kid to kid. I also found some blessing shoes for my incredibly-small-footed-daughter. Soemtimes, don't you feel like that's one of the big blessings of tithing? Finding what you need, for a good price? Well, I felt that yesterday. :) BTW, if you mention you were referred by me, you get 3 dollars off your purchase. ;) Really, once you go you won't stop.

Monday, June 08, 2009

6 Weeks Check-Up

Had my 6 week check up scheduled today. It was super fun, although I think I'm at a point in my life where finding a parking space, hauling children around etc., is more painful than the actual pap smear. How sad is that? I think I get to make a trip to Mr Mammogram in a couple of years, perhaps that will be more painful than parking at Kaiser.

As I was there I kind of felt like I was on one of those reality shows where you're booted off and you get to re-live your past (with Chris Dougherty singing "Home" in the background). ALL of those visits to my OB when we weren't pregnant and thinking that it would never happen. The lab, where I got to do all those lovely glucose tests (word on the street, they were supposed to have me do a 2 hour glucose at 6 weeks PP... but apparently they forgot about me, what a shame -- might do a fasting one, if I'm in the mood). The newborn club where I gave my failed attempt at breastfeeding. I even ran over to labor and delivery to drop off a thank you card for my good nurse. I'm just so glad not to be pregnant any more, I really am. I mean, I'm not particularly fond of where my life is right now, but I know this is "only for a moment" and it'll be over soon.

At the check-up they make you fill-out a depression questionnaire. I don't know a single person who's just had a baby who wouldn't show-up on that thing.
  • Do you sometimes cry?
  • Do you feel tired? (HELLO, why is that even on there?)
  • Do you get anxious for no reason?
The sad truth is I think almost all women get depressed after having a baby. It's a combination of the no sleep, the lack of routine, very little contact with the outside world, etc. Anyway I think it's smart for them to keep tabs on postpartum women, but it seemed a little overboard. I did get out a bit this weekend, and found me a couple of "projects" (aka, headbands) for me to work on. Go me.

Of course, they wanted to know what I wanted to do about birth control. About 95% of me wants to get someone's tubes tied but I've never been a huge fan of the finality of that, especially since I'm only 33. Most of me has thought I'd just get an IUD, but after talking it over with my doctor I'm a little on the edge right now. She said that there's often a lot of spotting for the first 6 months, and sometimes your period stops entirely. I am not sure. I'd love to hear from anyone who's had one.

And so I am only disabled for 2 more days. I wish I could lay around the house and eat some bon-bons.

Saturday, June 06, 2009

The Nordstrom's Secret

Shhh, I found out a secret at Nordstrom's.

My friend and I were looking in the baby section and I was looking for newborn socks and found a few in the clearance bin. Then, I found one with frilly edges, but wasn't labeled with a clearance price so I asked the salesman how much it was. He scans it and says, "a penny." At this point I think he's making fun of me. I mean, it is nordstroms and you can't plan on anything being THAT great of a deal so I said, "what was that?" and he says, "it's a penny."

True enough, it was a penny. He said that sometimes things get left behind when they were supposed to go to the "rack" so instead of finding them and sending them to the rack they just make the a penny.

So, all night we were hoping things were a penny.

So far, I only found socks. Let me know if you ever find anything. ;)

Friday, June 05, 2009

Thankful Prayers

I have been reading my first blog book, and I must admit the few entries are pretty tedious to wade through, but mid 2005 I think I came into my own. I'm fairly funny. No wonder people love me. ;)

Anyway, the world is bothering me lately. I can find SO many things that are driving me crazy about each and every member of our family, my job, my house, all of my "blessings." I also have been having REALLY bad prayers at night because I'm so tired and I can't concentrate and sadly, I can rarely really find anything I'm thankful for by that time of the day. So I constituted thankful prayers. Not just things that I'm thankful for -- but specifics. I am thankful for Drew because of how much he adores P, and sometimes watching him love her reminds me I love her that much too. I'm thankful for Conner because in all relative terms he's quite responsible. I am thankful for Spencer because he loves life. He's always so happy. I am thankful for P because she is starting to smile, and once she does the whole world lights up like a 9 million watt bulb.

So often, my prayers go "I'm thankful for our family, and for our jobs and for our home..." but working to find the specifics -- why today I really was thankful for those things has helped me out a lot. And I always get into bed feeling much happier than when I started the prayer.

Thursday, June 04, 2009

Hello {tap, tap, tap} Is this thing on?

Pulling Curls is at an all time low.
I have nothing to say, other than complain that my kids are driving me to the brink, and the fact that driving on little sleep is comparable to drunk driving...
I'm not sure I want to keep blogging.
I feel like it's turning into a giant complain fest/posting pictures of my baby blog.
I'm not really a big fan of those blogs.
I am a big fan of mine, when it's done right.
{sigh}
In other complaining news I thought I might have a blood clot in my leg this AM, and had to miss a mommy lunch with a bunch of co-workers. I was pretty-well living for a little time to act like an adult, and now that is gone. Thankfully, a band mom came over to watch P because I didn't want to take her to all the sickos at Kaiser. My doctor did some blood work, it's not a clot but he has no idea what it is, and it still hurts.
See, complaining.
Did I mention P doesn't like to burp?

Wednesday, June 03, 2009

WHY?

I hate our state.
I wouldn't live here if I wasn't supposed to, and really enjoyed most things.
But man, we are MESSED UP.

I just have a few questions:
1. Why does a correctional officer at the prison get SO much more than teachers. Just seems like if you catch 'em young...
2. Why can't medical patients pay a copay? Honestly, I think it would almost fund medical, and at least they'd realize an opportunity cost for coming to the hospital for every little thing.
3. Why do we pay our state legislature? I think they shouldn't get paid til' we get a budget, I mean really -- what else is in their job description? They're failing, let's all fire them.

Anyway, it's a delightful state otherwise. There really are so many perks to living here I can't list them all here (don't get me wrong, we have our downfalls)... but sometimes I think it'd be wise to split us in two or 3. We're bigger than many countries. We could totally beat them up.

In other news P is 5 weeks today. I am not getting my hopes up that C slept through the night at 6 weeks... and S at 7....

Tuesday, June 02, 2009

Tech-Free Tuesday

Hopping on quick before my time is out.

I am obsessed with headbands lately.

It is fairly dumb, but do you make them and do you make your own bows?

I love this little girl with a headband on, but so far the ones I've made (out of an old egg of knee highs) aren't doing it for me.

{sigh}

Really, I'm leaving.

Monday, June 01, 2009

Menu Plan Monday

Welcome back to reality. I seem to have a lot of leftovers in my fridge, so I'm trying to use those up.
  • Mexican: BBQ Pork Tacos (I have leftover BBQ pork, I think I'll add some refried beans from the cannary and boil them all together)
  • Salad: Asian Ramen/Chicken Salad (does anyone have a great recipe for this? It seems like I had one where I saute the noodles -- ramen's 10 for a dollar at Savemart through tomorrow, I had iceburg lettuce, ramen and leftover chicken all in my fridge -- I did find this one)
  • Pasta: Tuna Casserole
  • Kids: Pizzas (either homemade or french bread, depending on my will to live)
  • Chicken: BBQ Chicken (marinate in BBQ sauce or something else)
  • Other: Pork Chops, Baja Black Bean Burritos (recipe from Becky, it's delish), and casserole from the freezer.
Yum, yum.

My Personal Nauvoo

So, I'm vowing to write a blog entry about what I learned at church. Really, I'm back to the land of it's difficult to concentrate and not just because of my own laziness (although I'm fairly sure that's a pretty large component still).

Yesterday, my learning started at home. I try and watch a church movie while the kids are eating their lunch before church -- just to keep them entertained because I am alone trying to finish getting myself and P ready. We started watching Legacy (Legacy is a LDS produced movie about a pioneer girl who leaves her home with her family to start the journey west, you see much of the persecution of the saints as they journey west, it's really good at showing just how hard it was -- I'd love to loan out my copy if you want to see it) yesterday. I was taken back to the time I went with my ward, I was probably 16. Lots of tears were shed and I just couldn't imagine that God asked of those people what they were doing.

Then, I watched it yesterday, probably a good 18 years later (I've seen it in between now and then, but not many times) I watched it with new eyes. These eyes are also overly-emotional. I saw the main character leave her home, her brother, many of her possessions behind and travel west, I knew what was coming -- her husband leaving to join the Mormon battalion, her brother dying, having scurvy and living through the miserable conditions at Nauvoo. All of this because she believed in a church, and the prophet asked them to do these things (and hopefully they had a testimony of their own that they should do those things).

I was taken back to last fall. I won't dredge up all that yucka, but suffice it to say it was one of the least pleasurable experiences of my life. But I did it because a prophet asked me to (and because I prayed hard and felt it was something important that I do). I was thinking how at least this girl had seen her prophet, and he was suffering just as much as she. But, when she suffered he gave her a blessing. When I suffered I only got an otter pop, and after a while I couldn't even have those.

I have seen President Monson, and I had met President Hinckley, but I think of the many people in CA who have met neither, most likely won't, but they still went and did it. Of course, most of that is because of our church's strong belief that you need to believe on your own. I needed to know for myself that this was something I needed to do, not just believe on a man. Regardless, sometimes you are believing in the man -- and you do it.

Anyway, for those of you who aren't of the LDS faith -- is there something you believe in so strongly that you'd make huge personal sacrifices to make it happen, or do as they say? I would guess for most they have children, perhaps their close family, but that's about it.

And although we haven't be tarred and feathered, we haven't had our houses burned down, and we certainly haven't suffered like them -- I wonder if they'd switch places with us?

Anyway, just some thoughts I had. We also had a lesson on provident living and why we should live providently. Honestly, if we aren't aware of they "why's" at this point maybe we should go live in the trees... I consistently think we need more how's than why's, but that's just me. And let's face it -- I spent much of sunday school rocking a car seat. Delightful.

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