The Business of Being Born

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The Business of Being BornI’m using Netflix to fill my empty heart due to marching band this evening.
I’m watching the Business of Being Born.
I’m kind of shocked at it all.
But here’s the news they don’t tell you.
95 percent of your birth experience is one thing, your labor nurse.  If she is an advocate for you, or your personalities click, you will enjoy your birth.
If she doesn’t, you won’t.
Not mentioned anywhere on that film, probably because it’s something you have fairly little control over.

My patients don’t get unnecessary cesareans.  I have the words to talk to them and their doctor, to facilitate communication.

That’s not to say that some of my patients who have cesareans couldn’t have had a vaginal delivery, but to me it’s indicated.  You can thank the lawyers for that part — for I can be sued up to 18 years of age from that little fetus.  Darn you lawyers.

I also think that this film is just ANOTHER way to point fingers.  SHE did home a home birth, what an idiot.  SHE had a cesarean, her body didn’t release the “love cocktail” — she won’t love her baby and her baby will be without love. 

And to me, it’s those 18 years after that make a mom (plus the other 60 that she/he begs for your advice), not that first hour, or 24 hours.  And every mom deserves a standing ovation, epidural, cesrean, plopping that baby into a bin of granola or whatever.  She made the choice and that choice is fine.  I would hope that SHE is able to make the choice.  I really try to let my patients MAKE the choices.  My job is to inform, and they get to choose.  AND, if you feel like you’re not making choices — you need to let your nurse know that.  Just like at Nordstroms, if you think you’re selling you an ugly pair of leggings you’d stop them right there.  Be informed, make choices.  I love that.

I also really liked the midwife on that show, She seemed like the perfect medium between a home birth and a hospital.  Many midwives aren’t as smart as her. 

I didn’t think that I wanted to take advice from a former talk show host, regardless of all the research she’s done.  Here’s a newsflash Ricky Lake — I know more about birth then you.  You know more about white trash then I do.  THAT, is a fact.

Two other thoughts, I hate moms who want to have a home birth, but come to the hospital for that experience.  Sorry, we have policies and procedures that just HAVE to be followed.  I’m guessing you don’t have those at home.  You also need to be educated on HOW to deal with that pain and the emotions that will come along the trail to delivery.  You can’t come in expecting me to fix it all for you, without any thought of preparation for yourself.

AND lastly, I’m just not a fan of induction.  Throw arrows at me if you want, but that’s just something I really agreed with the film about.  Doctors and hospitals are so into their pitocin.  Sure, it’s sometimes necessary, but most of the time it’s not.  I have 12 bloody days before I let the picoin into my vein (BTW, if P had been born on her due date she’d be going to nursery tomorrow — and no, I’m not the slightest bit bitter).  Even then I probably cried more tears then I got of pitocin. 

But, my babies are here, they’re amazing and honestly I’m have such an amazing time with them NOW that for me, a birth experience is nice, but doesn’t compare to the here and now.  I love you moms, and all the choices you make.  Well, maybe not ALL the choices you make… but that’s a blog for another day.

Pulling Curls blog by Hilary EricksonCheck out Hilary's Most Popular Posts ~ Learn more About Hilary

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  1. says

    I agree with you about the nurse. I had a WONDERFUL nurse with Bria. Seriously made the experience awesome. My labor with Chloe was so fast I hardly noticed the nurse, but I don’t think she was bad.

    Sophia’s nurse was AWFUL and even stupid. I get mad whenever I think about how 5 minutes before Sophia was born she told me I would have the baby in 4 hours and to just get an epidural already.

  2. says


    I have three children and three very different experiences. One particular set of nurses and hospital personnel should not attempt to approach me in public, for fear of a scene that may or may not end with jail time for me. The other nurses, I will adore until the day my memory fails me. Beautiful people!

  3. says

    I liked that movie. It mirrored my experience with Jacob almost to a “T”. I found it comical yet serious and interesting.

    My nurses changed so often with Jacob that I don’t feel they had much to do with him or my experience.

    I had two nurses with Daniel and they were nice to me but again I don’t think they made my experience. My doctor did in that case. She stayed with me and breathed with me through every contraction from 5 cm until delivery. Amazing woman!

  4. says

    I had my children rather quickly after arriving in at the hospital so I don’t remember my nurses that well. Although I did notice a huge difference as I recovered the next couple of days. Some were just plain mean and others were wonderful. The ones who respected that after having 6 kids I kinda knew what I needed and what to do with the baby were great. The ones who insisted on treating me like I was completely clueless (or didn’t know how roughly they were treating me when taking necessary checkups) drove me nuts!

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