Comments on: What Do I Do if My Child is Being Bullied? Bullying stories to make a change

By: Pulling Curls

Pulling Curls — Wed, 08 Mar 2023 16:04:20 +0000

In reply to Debi. I am sure you've seen a lot in your years of teaching. I 100% agree that bulling is not something that should be ignored. However, I also don't think everything someone doesn't like is bullying and humans in general need to know the difference.

By: Debi

Debi — Wed, 08 Mar 2023 13:51:29 +0000

No. I taught for 15 years— everything from kindergarten to seniors in high school. Bullying is not something a student can just ignore. I’ve had a student commit suicide. I’ve seen countless “cutters”. Students are people with real feelings. They are not “ducks”. The sensitive students cannot, and should not, have to change who they are to deal with callous human beings.

By: Hilary Erickson

Hilary Erickson — Fri, 25 Jan 2019 21:30:53 +0000

In reply to Rachel. Yup -- it really is important!

By: Rachel

Rachel — Sat, 19 Jan 2019 16:13:55 +0000

I love how you discuss that there is a difference between bullying and teasing. I think this has been overlooked in the last few years. When I was growing up it was always teasing unless someone touched you. It’s important to teach our children the difference. Also, children are sometimes mean and make fun of you but that isn’t always bullying. I love your breakdown. Rachel from Explore Kid Talk

By: Hilary Erickson

Hilary Erickson — Fri, 22 Sep 2017 02:52:49 +0000

In reply to Annie. It's always a balance, right (annoyingly so). :)

By: Annie

Annie — Wed, 30 Aug 2017 05:46:57 +0000

Thank you for the article! Not EVERYTHING is bullying! I don’t want to under react, nor do I want to overreact. Overreacting raises wimpy kids! My kids have been told that there is a big difference between constructive criticism (get used to this one – you’ll find it in adult society on a regular basis), someone saying mean things (“You are a snot” falls into this category), gossiping (“Did you hear about so-and-so” – and if they run their mouths about someone else, they’ll run their mouths about YOU – but I digress), and bullying (usually involves some sort of physical contact and is NOT WORDS…other than the threat of “I’m going to beat you up”, “I’m going to assault/hurt/do something worse to you or someone you know.”

Kids need to get a thick skin, because as adults they will NEED IT.

When in doubt as to which category the item falls into, ask someone you trust who is NOT A PEER when you are a kid. They may overreact just like you!

By: Hilary

Hilary — Sun, 08 Feb 2015 04:44:45 +0000

In reply to Amanda. Awh, thanks Amanda, I am glad it was helpful!

By: Amanda

Amanda — Fri, 06 Feb 2015 01:14:06 +0000

Thank you! This hits the nail on the head. We are having a lot of issues of “bullying” and I love everything you have said! I will be sharing your blog!

By: Hilary

Hilary — Mon, 03 Nov 2014 16:30:59 +0000

In reply to Laura.

Laura, those are great thoughts. I think it’s extra hard for adults who felt bullied (although I think everyone is bullied at some point). STrong spines, that’s what my kids need — and a loving mom to come home to. 🙂

By: Laura

Laura — Sun, 02 Nov 2014 02:24:55 +0000

As a teacher, I find that I am constantly saying “that’s not bullying” because as someone mentioned in the comments, they’re hyper aware of it because we harp on it so much that they think everything is bullying. For example, when they’re playing soccer and one kid doesn’t guard the ball well enough and it gets stolen by a member of the opposite team, that’s not bullying, though I’ve had a kid tell me that it is before.

However, as someone who was bullied in elementary and high school, I can honestly say sometimes we as adults are guilty of quickly dismissing a child’s concerns about bullying because bullying is a strong word that carries strong consequences.

I think the best description of bullying that I ever heard was that it’s targeted mistreatment of an individual for any reason, and it’s repeated and it’s consistent. It’s often done in secret or in ways that are hard to peg and hard to clearly define as bullying, which is what makes it so hard to identify.

I had kids throw stuff at me, I had kids write stuff on bathroom stall walls, I had a boy repeatedly snap my bra strap because at 12 I was more developed than the rest of my classmates and this one figured out that I would be wearing a real bra and not just a trainer… and this is where bullying hits home for me, because when I told adults I trusted, they told me he probably had a crush on me and didn’t know how to express it.

It’s a hard topic because often, the kids being legitimately bullied feel like no one will believe them and no one will take them seriously, but then so many who aren’t being bullied at all cry bully the second something doesn’t go their way.

Good thoughts in this post, thanks for sharing!