I agree that not everyone needs/gets/wants to be a parent. I just didn’t want to, and this prompted me to, and I’m really glad that I did. 🙂
I think it is a rare home that a father staying home full time works. I think it’s WONDERFUL when it works…. I just don’t find that it often does. It wouldn’t for us.
I sometimes think if I had a lesbian lover and we raised kids I would more likely find someone who is as OCD as myself. My kids would be doomed… but, maybe I wouldn’t. I guess we’ll never know. It’s just nice to have the ying and the yang of a mother and a father. I have plenty of gay friends who are wonderful parents. I think they try extra hard to have the influence of the opposite gender in their children’s lives.
Thanks for your honest opinion, I like re-thinking my thoughts with comments like this. 🙂

Thanks Jill — yes, I think your whole life revolves around your priorities. I do think that working more as my kids get older is a pipe dream — unless I only worked during school hours. These older ones are a bigger mystery than ever! 🙂

But when I read this post, I had to say something. You see, I was raised Mormon, and you sort of just listed all of the reasons why I left the church when I was in my early twenties. I left because I don’t think God needs all people to be parents. I believe that a family can be a great family if the father stays home, and the mother works full time, like my husband and me. I believe that families work best when there are two parents, not a mother and a father necessarily. I believe that God has a plan for us all, but that plan doesn’t need to include a traditional family to be a Godly life. I believe that if you chose to have children, they should be your first love and priority, mother or father. Work should always take a back seat.

I loved what you said about divorce, though. It’s a terrible thing for a child to go through, and shouldn’t be an option just because marriage is hard. It is hard, putting your family before your own wants and needs. But you’re right, it’s worth it every day. Guess that value stayed with me when I left the church.

What I came away with after reading your post, is we have the life we live, if that makes sense. We set our priorities (which are different for all of us, no right or wrong), then you need to live by those decisions. Like you, we don’t have a boat or a vacation home, but we have a strong family base, and a great family connection. We don’t have a lot of material things we could have if I worked full time. We decided early on what we wanted in our family and stuck by that. As my family gets older it is will be easier to work more, and we will reap the benefits of this.
I am new to your blog, but I look forward to reading more.

Jill