Making Friends 101

Today at church we had a great lesson on activating the lesser active members of our church, and also those that are investigating the church. I just thought Michelle did such a great job, helping us realize all the resources the church has.
However, some of the comments in the class made me wonder.
I remember my mom telling me this story once when I was going into Junior high. She had a friend who had walked down the hall of somewhere (let’s pretend it was at school) and she was SO mad that her friend hadn’t said hi to her… and my mom reminded me that it is ME that needs to say high, and that making the effort yourself is what it’s all about.
The person that is going to actvate you is YOU. If you think you don’t have enough friends, gather your courage and invite a family that you met a church over for dinner. It’s just plain silly to sit around and wait for people to invite YOU places.
In fact, Drew and I were just invited to a family’s house that has just moved-in near us. She has a little boy the same age as Conner, and a little the same as Spencer. I am impressed by the courage it takes to invite an unknown family over to your house. And that’s the way life happens people — you’ve gotta take it into your own hands.
And now, that blog made no sense… could be fast sunday…

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  1. says

    Made plenty of sense.
    Although, I must post a small warning: I am usually pretty reserved and not very outgoing. When I moved down here I decided that I wouldn’t have friends unless I took initiative…so, I talked to everyone, invited myself to a scrapbooking group that I overheard talking at church (yes it’s true), invited people over, etc.
    4 months later I found myself as RS President…I think I may rethink this tactic in my next ward…:)

  2. says

    I gotta toot my own horn on this one. I wasn’t always this way, but moving to CA and being in such a transient circumstance, people were not jumping at the chance to know us. After our terrible car accident a friend in another stake actually had to find out who my RS Pres. was and tell her we needed help. I decided that never again would I move into a ward and wait to be greeted or fellowshipped. I realized that I could say “Hi, I’m new”, just as easily as someone else could say, “Hi, are you new?” It’s made all the difference for me. I love where I am now and the solid support group of friends I have here…it rocks!

    As a family we’ve decided to be the ones who take a treat to the new families in the ward and introduce ourselves as soon as we can after hearing their records read in at church. It’s so easy…and I like to think it makes a difference.

  3. says

    That totally makes sense! I was just complaining to dh yesterday that there’s a girl at church that never says hi to me. She says hi to people that a re right next to me, but not to me. And it’s really been bugging me. But after reading that, I realized that I don’t say hi to her, so I really can’t complain. Next time I see her, I’m going to make an effort to talk to her and see where it goes. Thanks!!!

  4. says

    Good reminder. So often we think that someone is not friendly or think “what’s her problem?” when really they may be going through a tough time and not even know how to reach out to others or they have been hurt too many times by friends.

  5. says

    One of my favorite quotes (don’t know the source or even if it’s accurate) that I remember from way back when probably in some YW class is “the best way to have a friend is to be a friend” and after growing up in the Air Force and then moving so often in our marriage, I learned that I can’t sit back and expect everyone to seek me outif I wanted to have friends, but to be the friendly one myself.

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