How Old Does a Child Have to be to Babysit

Figuring out how old a child has to be to babysit can be rough.  Plus, there is the issue of babysitting their OWN siblings at their own house, vs someone else’s children.  Plus, what age can a child stay home alone?

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How old does a child have to be to babysit, Legally?

In looking online, I could only find guidelines for when children can be left home alone.  Plus, most states only provide “guidelines” vs law on when kids can be left alone.

I found it interesting that the Red Cross recommends babysitting from ages 11-15.

There doesn’t seem to be a law, as far as my research shows — BUT, that doesn’t mean it can’t be a bad idea.

So, let’s talk more about it:

How old does a child need to be to babysit their siblings at home?

This is usually where it starts.  An older child starts to babysit at home.

For us, it’s certainly a progression, and usually started around age 10 or so (since it’s a progression, you’re not leaving them ALONE — especially for extended periods — til’ they’re closer to 11).

The child starts to have some time (with you at home) where they are in charge.  I encourage them to have activities planned, to see if this is something they could handle without you there.

You run to a neighbor’s and let the older child “be in charge”.  Of course, this will increase from 5 minutes to longer visits to the mailbox or even just a walk around the block.  You’re just testing the waters here.  Making sure everyone is comfortable with the situation.

Then, you take the big step of running to the grocery store with that child in charge.

Thank goodness for the age of cell phones where you can check in and they can call you if there is an issue!

Of course, this is just to grab a few things — not a FULL grocery trip.

Pro Tip:  If you have many children, I’d probably not leave them all with the oldest.  Maybe take 1 or two with you when you go for the first few times, just to see how it works out.  Sadly, I’d recommend taking the hardest to watch with you for the first few actual outings.

This needs to feel like a NATURAL progression — for everyone!  Both the older child, and for the younger ones.

They don’t notice a big change, because that older child has helped out before, and now is just helping out for a few more minutes.

Of course, you will feel a HUGE sense of “OH MY GOSH” the first time you leave.  BUT, be careful to make those outings short — so good outcomes happen for all the kids.

Then, you slowly just expand the outings.

For us, it took a LONG time to have a sit-down dinner we couldn’t leave quickly from.  And, a REALLY long time for us to be comfortable going to a movie or somewhere they might not be able to get hold of us immediately.

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How much do you pay your own kids to babysit?

For the earlier “mother’s helper” type responsibility, I pay in perks.  More computer time, a date with myself or my husband — and of course, lots of praise about how much they are helping you!

However, I do pay my older kids when they actually babysit.

I didn’t pay a ton though, and I often paid other older ones a small amount as well.

Example:  My oldest was 12, and my youngest was 2.  I paid him $2/hour to babysit, and I paid my middle child (who was 8 ) 50 cents/hour for being a good helper.

AND, in order to get paid the oldest 2 had to agree that things went well.  I also required dishes be put in the dishwasher and the house about the same as I left it.

**If my oldest child had to miss something or another babysitting gig in order to watch our kids, I did pay him $5/hour.  He understood that wouldn’t happen every time, but I did want to be sure that he knew I appreciated his willingness.  Also, we — at that point — were saving a small fortune in babysitting costs.  So, paying now and then was worthwhile for us.

NOTE:  My 2nd oldest (15) thinks he should get paid to watch his sister, who is 9 now.  I don’t pay for that.  She watches herself.  Yes, he may make dinner (and by make, I mean put something in the microwave), but he’s not really working. They’re just helping each other while I am gone.

And yes, he’s still bitter about it.

FYI, babysitting has ALWAYS been part of our budget — I always say it’s cheaper than a lawyer! 🙂

How old does a child need to be to babysit someone else’s children?

Oh man, this is hard. 

Honestly, I think I started at around 11.  I would also get REALLY overwhelmed when the kids wouldn’t listen.  I did ask my mom to come bail me out a few times when kids were just rotten.

And actually, it made me hate kids and not want to be a mom.

I didn’t have younger siblings — I was the youngest, so that may not have helped.

I also still don’t really love other people’s kids…. {there, I said it}.

It just was never a good fit for me — but because I grew-up in a church with a lot of small kids I got asked a lot.  I also liked money, so I did it a fair amount until I got too busy.

For us, we used kids that were at least 12.  

A few thoughts on this:

It can be awesome to train as a mother’s helper a few times before you take the big step of staying alone.  Watching how the mom treats the kids, and how the kids respond can be an eye opener when it’s not your own family.  Also, as a mom, a mother’s helper can be a HUGE benefit.  That kid can provide fun and excitement that you’re just too tired to provide.

DO NOT DISCOUNT A MOTHER’S HELPER, even if it’s not full-fledged babysitting.

Tips on sending YOUR child to babysit:

Encourage them to make a fun-pack to take with them with some toys and games that those children might like.  Bored kids get into mischief and if you can avoid that — it’s a win.

Encourage them to take a babysitting class.  Our local church often does one around age 11 and the red cross has classes about it.  Our local community center has a babysitting class (where kids get CPR training) as well.

Be at home when they go — and encourage them to call if they feel over their heads.  You want your child to have a good experience.

Heap a heck-lot of praise on them — tell them how amazing it is that they are making their own cash!  It IS amazing!

Emergency Sheet — send my emergency sheet with them, so they can get all the info they need!

Tips on hiring a young babysitter

Know teenagers.  For us, this was easy, because my husband taught high school, and I was very active in our church youth group with the girls.  For us, we looked for:

Fun kids — kids that we just enjoyed being around

Inventive kids — kids that had something to offer our kids.  

Boys — I think it is easy to discount a male babysitter, but our boys (when we just had 2 small boys) LOOOOVED male babysitters, and honestly — I found them to love the act of babysitting more.  No sitting on the couch texting, they were always playing legos or lincoln logs.

Be sure to ask the sitter how it went — your children should be on their BEST behavior for a baybsitter, and I’d be very clear with them, that if the sitter had issues, THEY will have issues the next day.

Be sure to ask your kids how it went — some sitters did nothing. They let kids watch TV and they texted.  And my kids would tell me that. They didn’t get invited back as frequently.  I wanted engaged sitters, and that’s what I got.

How much to pay a young babysitter

I don’t think you need to go with the minimum wage.  We always did $5/hour — and often, we’d just do $20/night — some nights being longer, and some being shorter.

We had a pretty standard set of babysitters, so I figured it evened-out and they were always willing to come again — so I was willing to pay. 🙂

Of course, college kids should get paid more, and I often paid more once they were able to drive themselves.  So, a lot of it depends on the kid and how much you love them. 

How old does a child need to be to stay alone?

I found this really helpful table by Latchkey Kids — along with references.  Clearly, it depends on the state.  Most states leave it up to parent’s judgment, and some say ranges from 6-14.  Many are just guidelines — and frankly, that’s nice.

For us, it really depends on the child.  My youngest is just about 10.  I have left her to run to the grocery store, or to pick up an older sibling.  I have not left her alone at night, as she has a bit of a tender soul.

However, now that she’s 10, I might do it.  Just to go to dinner, or run some errands.

She also has resources around us that she can easily ask for help.

One of my BEST tips is to have an emergency sheet for your child or a babysitter to access at home:

And check out some of my other favorite parenting posts:

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