Looking to get your partner more involved in pregnancy, labor birth — and perhaps most importantly, PARENTING? It’s SO important to do as much of this together as possible (fortunate — for him, his pelvis likely won’t be aching like yours is…. but other stuff he can be involved in). Today I’m going to give you 3 tips to get them involved in birth prep!
Before we get going — why on earth take the word from someone at “Pulling Curls???” Great question! Many of you may know me as The Pregnancy Nurse®. I’ve been a nurse since 1997 and I’ve got 20 years of beside L&D experience. Now I’m the internet’s go-to birth educator. I’m so glad you’re here with me!
Honestly, so many women ignore this part (to really poor consequences, ultimately), so I’m really glad we can chat about this!
Invite
This one can feel like you have to do everything (including invite them), but they may also not want to over-step. For instance, they probably don’t want you coming to their physicals, so they’re not sure if you want them there with you at appointments. And, some women don’t WANT their partner’s at the appointments — everyone’s different, and communication is key (as always).
And frankly, it may not be the best use of your family’s time, but invite them. See if they can come!
(and don’t get your feelings hurt if they can’t — work is tricky to shift around)
Tell them you’d love them there for:
- Appointments with your provider
- Any classes you’re doing through your provider
- Ultrasounds or other testing
Sure, you can do the 3-hour glucose on your own, but when they’re there to support you it allows them to actually see what you’re doing to keep this baby healthy and may help them have a mind-shift as to their part in all of this.
Now’s a great time to share this post with them — I have a partner series they might be interested in:
And, if you’re thinking there is ZERO chance they want emails from me — grab this birth plan series and invite them to sit down and help you with your birth plan. They get a say in this too (especially the baby choices):
And while we’re here — invite them to do kick counts with you. I honestly didn’t even think of it til’ I was talking to some people about them. It reminds them that this pregnancy is real and there are things both of you can do to stay safe. And, if you’re thinking “kick counts”???? I have a cheat sheet (because I’m shocked by how many providers share them wrong):
Kick counts are also awesome to do with baby’s siblings — fun for the whole family to feel for baby to kick!
Share
Since you’re here (LOVE that by the way) you’re likely watching videos, reading articles and maybe following a few good sources on social media (be sure to watch those sources) — you’re starting to get prepared for this birth.
Do you and your partner 💑 want to be more prepared for your upcoming delivery? This is for you!
So, use those share buttons when you have an aha moment that you think would benefit them.
I’d also recommend including a message about why you thought it was important (maybe to differentiate it from any cat videos you usually send).
I’d also bring it up as you’re at home together — “Hey, honey — did you get that video from The Pregnancy Nurse I sent you? I thought it was so cool to learn what contractions actually do — isn’t it amazing???” This will clue them in to the fact that this is important to you. I always have to remind myself that they’re not mind readers….
BTW if you’re looking for more articles to prepare you for labor — check these out:
- Informed Consent During Pregnancy: Knowing Your Rights
- You Don’t Need to Know Everything—Just This Before Birth
- Vacuums, Forceps and Birth: What Every Parent Should Know About Assisted Deliveries
- Kick Counts Made Simple: FAQs, Expert Tips, and Why It Can Save Babies’ Lives
- 5 Things I Did for a Faster Labor
Prepare
While reading articles, watching videos or reels (btw, be sure to follow The Pregnancy Nurse on your favorite platform — You Tube, Tiktok, Instagram, Facebook) is amazing — I just want to share a few facts about using social media for prep:
- There are a lot of poor sources out there, and sometimes it can be hard to tell who’s good, and who’s not (especially on short-form videos — people are very good at acting like experts).
- You’re going to waste a LOT of time — so many repeats (hello to all my kick counts videos — I 💓 you — but I’m sure it gets old if you’re watching me over and over again). I feel this as I look for gardening content online.
- Your partner isn’t with you — you’re going to get a LOT of good info, but you want them prepared too (without you having to sit down and teach them everything you know).
That’s why I created this.
- Taught by an evidence and experience-based expert you can trust
- Cut-out the fluff (and no repeats) to get you prepared in record time
- Engaging to where you’re both going to enjoy it. It’s the class for both of you!
I am proud to say that class has prepared thousands of couples since 2016 and I update it constantly to make sure it’s up to date for what you’ll be facing in the hospital!
Ok, — how involved is your partner in this birth prep? Do you wish it was MORE, or are you just not sure how to best involve them. I know you’re busy, and using your time wisely during this busy season is smart. Let me know in the comments.
I’m so glad you’re here getting prepared with me. Want more articles on getting a supportive partner?
- How to Be a Supportive Husband and Partner During Pregnancy
- What To Do About A Selfish Husband During Pregnancy?
- What to Do If Your Girlfriend is Pregnant
- Can I Breastfeed my Husband During Pregnancy?
- My Boyfriend Says I Feel Different Inside During Pregnancy
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