Music lessons can be really expensive. I know this because my husband is a music teacher. He taught lessons for the first few years of our marriage until he now teaches music at a school. I get the sense that not many things strike fear in the hearts of parents more than teaching their own kids’ music lessons.
I also spent a fair amount of time teaching music lessons on my own. That, of course, was after years and years of my own lessons.
True life confession time, I was considering majoring in music — it’s a good thing I didn’t. A house with 2 music majors would be a broke house indeed.
ANYWAY. I started teaching flute lessons when I was in high school. I didn’t LOVE it, but the money was good and I really enjoyed playing my flute so I kept doing it until I hit nursing school. It got too complicated at that point. I will admit that I had a couple of REALLY good flute teachers, who gave me a real love for the flute and music in general. I wanted to be that for the girls I taught.
{I also want to put a tip in for the fact that my best teachers didn’t have a doctorate, in fact — the one that did, probably was my worst teacher. My favorite ones were college students — if you’re looking for a music teacher for your own kids I’d look no further from the local college, I bet they’d have some good ones to recommend!}
Fast forward quite a few years and we got our own piano — it’s a requisite when your husband’s a music teacher (we actually got it free, from someone wanting to get it out of their garage, it’s not in perfect shape but it still plays music pretty well).
I knew I wanted the kids to learn music but the thought of doling out hundreds of dollars/month to teach them what the basic notes were was laughable to me. I mean, my husband is a MUSIC TEACHER. But, like most things, it has fallen on me to teach my kids piano. My mom actually taught me piano, and while I am no virtuoso, I can plunk through some good primary tunes. Here are my 8 tips for teaching your own kids:
1. Take a deep breath. It’s not going to be easy and you need to put your teacher hat on when you teach. Since I taught other people’s kids I am able to do that. Your kids are going to push you, just like they do every minute of every day.
2. Pick a curriculum. Obviously, if you’re teaching your kids piano you must know some piano of your own. I just went with the books I had as a kid. It makes it easy to progress. I teach out of 3 books. I do a John Thompson, and a “fun” book (which I have often found at Goodwill or a music store) and the Bastien series.
3. Find some theory. Since my kids don’t seem to (at least thus far, I haven’t started Princess P, yet) be true virtuosos theory is extra important as they will likely be switching instruments in the future. Knowing the circle of 5ths is important and I love playing arpeggios while I’m waiting for them to get to the piano. They pretend like they can play them too, but they can’t. I have found great theory pages on the internet, as well as us going through some theory books. I am a HUGE fan of being able to clap out rhythms as that is what saved my bacon in sight reading most often.
4. Pick a day. We do piano on Wednesday afternoons. It’s our lesson time. When it’s loosey-goosey it ends-up not being a lesson. I will admit to taking off most of my pregnancy with Princess P (my patience was thin and sitting on the piano bench was horribly painful). The benefit of teaching your own child is not wasting your time/money when they literally can’t practice (because they’re sick or whatnot). I am not a piano nazi — we try.
5. Have a notebook to write it down. I write down all their assignments in the notebook, and what they need to be working on (as well as noting it in the music). That way I don’t get to hear that they didn’t know “that’s what I wanted.”
6. Get a metronome. I don’t think I really understood how imporatant timing was until I went into band and started playing in large groups. A metronome is unforgiving. Just how I want to be as a teacher. 🙂
7. Play duets. Some of my favorite time with my mom was playing duets. It’s fun to play together! Also, when you tell them to come grab you to work on your duet, that gives you extra time to sort of slide into helping them practice. I could never practice with my mom looking over my shoulder, but duets give you a reason to be there (I’m a fan of helping your kids as they practice, but I’m not sure it’s always worth the fights it causes).
I sometimes look like this during our lessons.
8. Take another deep breath. And re-evaluate if it’s really not working. Teaching your own kids really isn’t for everyone! BUT, if you can do it — it may just be the thing your kid remembers growing up, and when he’s called upon to play a hymn, he can remember that his mom taught him how to do it! In reality, I’m not amazing at the piano. My kids can’t go all that far before they outpace me — but until then it’s just them and me (and sometimes steam coming out my ears).
So, do you think I’m crazy for teaching my own kids!? Tell me in the comments!
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I don’t think you’re crazy, as long as you’re being careful to teach them good habits as far as hand positioning and such go. Since you do have a musical background, you can give them a good foundation, and there will hopefully be the option of continuing with another teacher who can take them further, if the interest is there later. But I don’t think I would recommend that route to someone who doesn’t have that musical foundation themselves. (I say this as someone who did major in music, has been teaching flute lessons as my primary part-time job since I was a sophomore in college, and has begun teaching beginner piano myself this year–I’m having to brush up myself, but I did take 7 years of piano lessons + the required semester when I was in college. I also say this as someone who had to unlearn some bad habits and pick up some new ones when I switched to my second flute teacher as a pre-teen.)
I probably am not as good about hand position as I wish I was…. that will remind me to try harder next lesson. 🙂 I completely agree that a poor teacher can totally wreck you! {I had two}
I just began the journey of teaching my 7 yr old piano lessons. Our household sounds similar. My husband and I both have music degrees (and yes, you were right, we are broke because of it!) Ok have never taught piano before, but I have taught voice lessons and I have vivid memories from my own many years of piano lessons. We are three weeks in and the struggles are there. I already teach her at home, so I know her meltdowns (which she feela safe to have dor me and might nit have in a traditional pianovteachers studio) usually just point to a need for change of learning style. I have to remind myself to take deep breaths and keep the learning fun. Last week’s lesson we played tambourine more than the piano because she was stressing about finger position and needed help with pace and rhythm. The week before that we left the piano and went yo the school table and made flash cards together and composed rhythm patterns with them. I can tell she still enjoys getting to grow in her personal practice time at the piano..and not playing a ton at the keyboard during a lesson isn’t stopping that. I love that I get to pick up on that part of it…where just a weekly lesson i wouldn’t really hear her progression as well.
It can be really fulfilling! It sounds like it’s working well for you guys!
Thank you..i love music so much ..it help in harmonizing the soul.
AGreed!