Today we are talking about those final weeks and days of pregnancy. I think a lot of women just picture the love of your new baby, but as you grow a baby (or babies in Katelyn’s case) it can just be MISERABLE towards the end.
Today’s guest is my good friend Katelyn Fagan from What’s Up Fagans. She is my go-to gal for all things cleaning and was on a previous episode on getting kids to do chores. When we recorded this episode, she was just days from the delivery of her twins (who ended up being 8 pounds 11 oz and 8 pounds 12 oz — OH. MY. GOSH). We were just talking about how miserable she was (which is normal) and we wanted to share that with all of you. Check out her Instagram for TONS of good tips!
View this post on Instagram
38 Weeks pregnant with twins today! Officially the longest I have ever carried twins (my first set were born a day before 38 weeks). Had a doctor appointment today and they said my Monday ultrasound estimated the twins at 8lbs 2oz and 8lbs 4oz. 😳 She also stripped my membranes for me as I was at 3cm almost 4cm. And… If I don’t have them in the next week, I will go in to be induced next week Wednesday! The end is here!! Now to go walking and hoping some real contractions get started now. Membrane stripping has helped in the past so 🤞. #twins #twinpregnancy #twinpregnantbelly #babybelly #pregnancylife #pregnantwithtwins #twinpregnancybump #momsofmultiples #twinsandmultiples #twinmama #twinmom #twinmomlife #38weekspregnant #thirdtrimester #9monthspregnant #38weeks
This episode was inspired by my post on the importance of going the full 40 weeks.
Big thanks to our sponsor The Online Prenatal Class for Couples. If you’re heading into your due date, there is STILL time to get in a class before your babies come.
Waiting for Delivery
In this episode
How miserable you feel towards the end of pregnancy
What you can do to mitigate how miserable you feel
How using a belly support band to help you feel better (this is Katelyn’s post on it)
How hard people asking you when the baby is coming is
Some twins talk about inducing/vaginal delivery of twins.
How to navigate the mental game of your due date.
Navigating different birth plans with your providers.
Katelyn’s Happy Ending:
View this post on Instagram
👶🏻👶🏻FOUR WEEKS OLD! These #twins are growing and doing so well despite the daily cries 🤪 We are getting into better rhythms. Nursing is going well, though they still get formula a couple times a day, especially before bed. I made some protein lactation balls to hopefully help up my supply a little. At night they can wake up between 1-3 times and when one gets up I make sure to get the other up too. I am up for about an hour at a time during the night when tending to them. They go to bed for the night sometime around 9pm (hopefully) and I go to bed by 10:30. It is super hard to actually wake in the middle of the night as I dream I am attending to the crying baby only to wake up and realize I am still lying down and a baby is still crying. 🤣 I actually feel great once I get up (between 6:30-8am) and get going. My big kids are all amazing helpers. The swing is a lifesaver, as always, to calm fussy babies during the day. They have taken turns being fussy. 🤷 I have to say, these babies are perfect and I love them both like crazy!! 😍 They are exactly as they should be – growing, healthy, happy (as newborns can be). I look forward to seeing smiles soon and having them a little more awake during the day. I am so glad God saw it in his wisdom to give us two at once… Again! I can’t imagine not having Christina or Thomas not here! #twinboyandgirl #boygirltwins #4weeksold #twinclothing #twinclothes #twinmama #twinmom #twinmomlife #lifewithnewborns #lifewithtwins #twinnewborns #postpartumlife #postpartumjourney #twinstimetwo #bigfamilymom
Be sure to check out my bonus episode about how Katelyn advocated for herself during delivery
Other things that might interest you
Katelyn’s twins birth story (which is awesome!)
Katelyn’s info on VBAC
My post on diastasis pubis (pelvic pain in pregnancy).
Diastasis rectus pain in pregnancy
Anxiety during a Covid pregnancy podcast.
Producer: Drew Erickson
Epi 066 Due Date Psyche with Katelyn Fagan Mastered.mp3 – powered by Happy Scribe
[00:00:00.330] – Hilary
Hey, guys, welcome back to the Pulling Curls Podcast. Today, we have a special treat, it is an episode I just decided to record one night with my friend. We’re going to talk about going to the finish line a pregnancy. Let’s untangle it.
[00:00:22.750] – Hilary
Welcome to the Pulling Curls Podcast, I’m Hilary, your curly headed host on the podcast, where we untangle everything from pregnancy, parenting and home routines. I want you to know that there are no right answers for every family. And I find that simplifying my priorities is almost always the answer. It’s tangled just like my hair.
[00:00:47.920] – Hilary
OK, guys, before we get started, please leave a review. Think of all the babies I’ve delivered. Doesn’t that does a review? I think it does. OK, tonight’s guest has been on the podcast before, but we were just chit chatting on Facebook Messenger and I was like, we should record a podcast tonight just to talk about just how miserable it is that 40 weeks. And I want you guys to know that it is miserable. So tonight’s guest is soon to be the mother of seven and she is bookending.
[00:01:16.000] – Hilary
So her first were a set of twins and her last, she says this is her last but, you know, never say never is a set of twins again. So she will have a total of seven kids with two sets of twins. I want to introduce my good friend Katelyn Fagan.
[00:01:30.460] – Hilary
This episode of the Pulling Curls Podcast is sponsored by the online prenatal class. For couples, it simplifies understanding labor so you can have a more relaxed pregnancy and birth taught by a highly experienced labor and delivery nurse and can be done wherever you are, whenever you want. No more arranging busy schedules to fit in a prenatal class, say 15 percent. With the coupon code UNTANGLED, you can find out more at Pulling Curls Podcast and the menu under courses or in this episode, show notes.
[00:01:58.150] – Hilary
Hey, Katelyn, how many weeks are you?
[00:02:01.960] – Katelyn
I am thirty eight weeks pregnant today with twins.
[00:02:05.920] – Hilary
Oh my gosh. And how big were your last babies?
[00:02:10.630] – Katelyn
So I have five kids already, and my last child was my biggest at 11 pounds. Two ounces.
[00:02:17.200] – Hilary
You are not growing ten pound twins. I will not allow it.
[00:02:21.220] – Katelyn
Oh yeah. No.
[00:02:23.710] – Hilary
She was… She was overdue though, right?
[00:02:26.880] – Katelyn
Like two days.
[00:02:28.480] – Hilary
OK, so not super overdue but a little bit now.
[00:02:31.210] – Katelyn
Right. So my son, which was my first vaginal delivery, he was 13 days overdue and he was only nine pounds, eight ounces. Only…
[00:02:41.650] – Hilary
You grow ’em big.
[00:02:43.370] – Katelyn
I grow ’em big. My first set of twins, which that was my first pregnancy, there were six pounds, 15 ounces, six pounds, 14 ounces and a day before thirty eight weeks. So I’m officially the most pregnant with twins I’ve ever been.
[00:02:55.870] – Hilary
Oh my gosh. And it’s your last. Well, let’s bookend with another set of twins.
[00:03:01.490] – Katelyn
No, no, I think we’re good.
[00:03:04.720] – Hilary
Also, but you had your last babies in Texas, so they knew they had to be big and now you live in New York. So hopefully these babies understand that not everything’s big in New York.
[00:03:13.120] – Katelyn
Very true. I mean, it’s the Big Apple. But, you know.
[00:03:17.560] – Hilary
You don’t live in the Big Apple.
[00:03:19.600] – Katelyn
I don’t live in the city. No, I do not.
[00:03:21.950] – Hilary
OK, so how are you feeling?
[00:03:25.120] – Katelyn
Very big and sore and pregnant, tired
[00:03:31.750] – Hilary
Yeah, I mean…. So Katelyn and I were just talking today and I was like, you know what, let’s record a podcast really quick, because I think everyone thinks that they feel the absolute worst. Which you totally do. You totally feel the absolute worst? Right.
[00:03:44.290] – Katelyn
Yeah, of course.
[00:03:45.100] – Hilary
It’s just miserable those last few weeks. And so what… Are you doing anything to mitigate how miserable you are?
[00:03:53.830] – Katelyn
Yes, I am trying very hard to stay positive and resting as much as possible as well. So because I mean, I’ve gone overdue three times. Right? And hit thirty eight weeks pretty much with two sets of twins. So like I’ve been pregnant a long time but I and like the waiting game is like the hardest part. It’s like the mental aspect I think, I mean physically like I’m in so much pain. But I also think mentally when you’re not in the right space it just makes it so much worse because everyone’s asking you, when are those babies coming? When are you due? Are you going to have them tomorrow? You know, and it’s just like, shut up. No, I don’t know. Like, just …
[00:04:39.610] – Hilary
Yeah, I found that to be really hard as a labor nurse because all my labor nurse friends were like, when are you getting induced? And I was like, “I’m not getting induced.” I did end up getting induced, but I went 12 days over with my last baby, my final baby. So I’m a big fan of letting Mother Nature take its course. So some people are going to be saying, “Katelyn , you’re insane. Why don’t you get induced? Because you’re pregnant with twins and they might have induced you, but you had a C-section with your first.
[00:05:04.990] – Katelyn
Yes. So because I am a VBAC every time I have a vaginal birth, pretty much most doctors really don’t want to induce you. They get… They might break your water. My doctor today stripped my membranes. But that’s kind of what they feel most comfortable with. And so they really just wants to go into labor. So with my son, which my first VBAC and they let me go thirteen days. But I mean, like he was born the day that they’re like, “all right, well we have a C-section scheduled for you that day.” So I was like, “well hey, he made it in time, you know, so…
[00:05:39.400] – Hilary
Just under the line Mikey.
[00:05:41.560] – Katelyn
[00:05:43.900] – Hilary
So the risk of uterine rupture isn’t any bigger with twins, surprisingly, than it is with a singleton pregnancy. We’ve been reading up, me and Katelyn.
[00:05:50.920] – Katelyn
Yeah, so which is which is good to know.
[00:05:54.010] – Hilary
[00:05:55.450] – Katelyn
[00:05:55.870] – Katelyn
But yeah, it’s no more or less dangerous to VBAC with twins than it is with one baby. Now my twins now are both head down. So like great position and good job guys. My first set of twins were both breech, which is why I had the C section in the first place.
[00:06:12.400] – Hilary
Yeah. And so baby, the first twin… That matters though, that twin has to be a head down and then the second twin can kind of be whatever, because honestly, once the first twin comes out, it’s like a cartwheel in your uterus. We’re never sure what’s going to happen to twin B so.
[00:06:27.220] – Katelyn
Yeah, pretty much. But most of my doctors have been like, well, as long as baby A is head down, you’re good to go, so.
[00:06:34.330] – Hilary
[00:06:37.750] – Katelyn
I mean, they would prefer both of head down, I’m sure, but.
[00:06:41.620] – Hilary
Well, yeah, you can attempt a vaginal delivery as long as the first one is set down, but there is always the chance that B won’t cooperate. Hopefully mostly you just need a very patient doctor that will help guide that baby, because at that point you can even deliver breach I’ve delivered second twin breach. The problem is you just cannot deliver an arm or only one leg.
[00:07:05.860] – Katelyn
All right. I’ll keep that in mind.
[00:07:06.650] – Hilary
You have to be able to get both legs or a head or a butt. No arms, no arms.
[00:07:11.980] – Katelyn
No, no, no single arms, OK.
[00:07:14.530] – Hilary
Anyway, this podcast got a little crazy here in case anybody’s pregnant with twins. So.
[00:07:20.860] – Katelyn
We should do separate twins podcast, I guess.
[00:07:24.370] – Hilary
I know, but I’ve literally given all of my twin information here. That was everything for my readers.
[00:07:32.140] – Katelyn
[00:07:33.310] – Hilary
What are you. I know you’ve been wearing a belly band support.
[00:07:36.680] – Katelyn
Oh yeah. And it’s made a huge difference. Huge difference. And I’ve never worn one in any other pregnancies and I’m kind of like “why? I’m such an idiot.” Like it’s helped a lot with back pain, with just lower leg pain and swelling and all of it.
[00:07:52.540] – Hilary
Yeah, I’m really ticked off because my first doctor, I asked him about it. I was not the labor and delivery nurse and he was like, “well, it really restricts fetal movement.” Which literally makes no sense now that I’ve been a labor nurse for a long time. And so we encourage his patients not to wear them. But if you guys haven’t seen them, it’s like a big old strap that goes like the lower back and then under your belly. So it just helps support your belly instead of straining those poor little ligaments, especially in Katelyn’s condition, because she can have 20 pounds of baby in her.
[00:08:21.340] – Katelyn
Yeah, pretty much.
[00:08:22.330] – Hilary
But I mean, you do you probably. So if each baby’s like seven pounds and then you got to think four pounds of placenta and then four pounds of water, maybe two pounds of water, you’ve got to be close to 20 pounds.
Yeah. I mean, so my first set of twins, they were almost seven pounds each. And I was like, yeah, I think I lost 20 pounds on the operating table with placenta, baby, fluids.
[00:08:45.410] – Hilary
[00:08:45.930] – Katelyn
There it is. Twenty pounds. Quickest weight loss ever by the way.
[00:08:49.060] – Hilary
A huge weight loss program.
[00:08:51.330] – Katelyn
[00:08:52.590] – Hilary
The problem is all the late nights after that that require M &Ms to keep you awake.
[00:08:58.540] – Katelyn
Yeah. Then you put on some
[00:09:01.870] – Hilary
Anything else you’re doing. Now. You have lots of other kids so hopefully they’re helping around the house.
[00:09:06.580] – Katelyn
Yeah. All the kids have chores. We’ve talked about chores and stuff, but yeah. So I think but I think we talked about a little bit about the mental game. I feel like being overdue or going a long time being pregnant. And I think this time I’ve just what I recommend is always just tell yourself the due date is not the end and just give yourself another week or two just to plan for that, that you will go over. Because if you plan for like now, that’s it, then it’s a lot harder emotionally, I think, to to not have your baby by that due date and then you freak out and then you just get upset, mad and angry and all the emotions.
[00:09:45.640] – Hilary
I think that is such a good way to look at it, because due dates are not perfect. A lot of it depends on when you ovulate and I’m a late ovulator. So my do it it always gets pushed back anyway, so.
[00:09:55.430] – Katelyn
Oh really. Yeah. And I see this time I almost feel like I’m further along than actually my date says because I think I’m an early ovulator so whatever.
[00:10:05.020] – Hilary
Yeah. Who knows?.
[00:10:06.580] – Katelyn
Who knows?. That’s, that’s just it. I mean so most doctors that I’ve been to like don’t want to change the due date and I just want to base it on the last menstrual period. They do care how long your normal cycle is. It is like “well, we’re just going to do twenty eight days because that’s the average.” Even though mine’s shorter than that typically. So it’s just one of those like that. We’re just going to keep it there unless the early ultrasounds way different, but even six days ahead of like my estimated date. So they still do.
[00:10:38.710] – Hilary
Oh really. So you’re if we went by the ultrasound you’d be almost thirty nine weeks.
[00:10:42.580] – Katelyn
Yeah. Tomorrow I would be thirty-nine weeks.
[00:10:47.950] – Hilary
Ohhh! I am keeping a swear inside guys.
[00:10:52.780] – Katelyn
Yeah. So I’ve asked them like, “well, you know, does that matter?” And they’re kind of just like, “whatever.”
[00:10:59.230] – Hilary
Although since you don’t want to be induced it actually goes in your favor because they are not going to let you hit 40 weeks.
[00:11:04.360] – Katelyn
No, no. I mean today she was like, “yeah. So if you don’t have these babies by next week, Wednesday like, call us, we’ll schedule the induction at the hospital.
[00:11:12.370] – Katelyn
OK, so they will. Are they going to pitocin you? Or they’ll break your water?
[00:11:15.490] – Katelyn
She said pitocin. Now I go to a large practice and everyone’s been slightly different. So who actually knows what would happen?
[00:11:24.280] – Hilary
And Katelyn and I have talked a lot about this. Now, they cannot force her to have a C-section.
[00:11:28.030] – Katelyn
[00:11:28.570] – Hilary
They can encourage her to have a C-section. She cannot force them to order pitocin. So that’s where they’re both at. A low dose pitocin, I think would be fairly safe. But it’s really just up to the OB.
[00:11:41.290] – Katelyn
Yeah, especially because, you know, like it’s not like I haven’t dilated at all or like nothing’s happening, like…
[00:11:47.830] – Hilary
Are you three centimeters is what you said?
[00:11:49.400] – Katelyn
Yeah. She said three today. So three going on four or something. I don’t know but…
[00:11:54.370] – Hilary
Well as many kids as you had I mean they probably could stretch you to six.
[00:12:00.980] – Katelyn
Well, right? So, like breaking my water, I feel like would be a legitimate option as well. If they do want to do that. One of my other babies, they broke the water and then they gave me a little pitocin to speed things along later. So there are some options with VBAC. And I think as long as you are being monitored pretty closely and you’re at the hospital, as long as your doctor and you are comfortable with such a thing, that is an option.
[00:12:25.850] – Hilary
Well, the other thing is you’re done having babies. So, yeah, I think there are worse things than a uterine rupture. That’s horrible to say, but yeah, there are worse.
[00:12:34.820] – Katelyn
Well, yeah, hopefully the rupture doesn’t cause more serious issues. Yeah, that’s true. Yeah. That’s always the concern with the rupture right now.
[00:12:43.040] – Hilary
Everybody, keep in mind that Katelyn has had four other vaginal deliveries, so she’s had the three three other deliveries. The math is so hard with so many twins. So she had a C-section, a three vaginal deliveries, obviously a very tested uterus and pelvis.
[00:12:58.520] – Katelyn
Yeah. With large babies, by the way.
[00:13:00.170] – Hilary
Yeah. So, you know… OK, so I just want to encourage everybody to understand that it is miserable as you get towards your due date and just hang in there. While we’ve talked about induction. I’m not a fan of induction when you can try and wait it out. And honestly, so in California, which is where I had my two last babies you get off at, you get off work at thirty six weeks, which meant I started getting paid disability. And so I started to just look at it like I’m just getting paid because every day you go past your due date is just extra money because they don’t start your other six weeks or 12 weeks until after you have the baby. So it’s just extra paydays because that’s what I was looking at it like. So, you know, maybe you should ask Josh to pay you for each of these days that you keep the babies inside because it really is quite a cost savings.
[00:13:47.040] – Katelyn
Yeah, yeah, sure. Or pay myself disability. I don’t know. Anyway.
[00:13:55.760] – Hilary
And you can pay yourself in brownies.
[00:13:58.730] – Katelyn
Yeah. And I might be, I don’t know, maybe the M&Ms we’ve been eating and stuff.
[00:14:03.950] – Hilary
Anyway. Katelyn, stay hydrated.
[00:14:06.950] – Katelyn
Yes, for sure.
[00:14:07.730] – Hilary
Hopefully when this podcast comes out we just have a picture of you with two babies and finally you have them outside of you.
[00:14:14.600] – Katelyn
That would be great. Yeah, but yeah, I mean, I just I just think it is better to go naturally into labor. I agree with Hilary. Hundred percent avoid the induction even though you are miserable like it sucks so bad. And it’s really hard to plan without that due date. My mother-in-law has been on call for the month, like waiting for me to tell her when to come because… Who knows? Right, with twins and whatever. But it’s just what it is. But you have more time to prep your house and get everything ready for those babies. Right? More time to nest and stuff. So that’s cool.
[00:14:50.480] – Hilary
Or lay on the couch.
[00:14:51.770] – Katelyn
Or sleep as much as possible.
[00:14:53.690] – Hilary
Oh, one other thing I wanted to mention. So you guys are all in this position also if you’re pregnant. Katelyn’s husband was not able to come to any of the ultrasounds, which with twins, she had a lot of them. And so that was a real bummer. But he got to go to these last ones, right?
[00:15:07.310] – Katelyn
Yeah, he got this other one. And I had this last Monday, so two days ago, and he came to my appointment today. So Covid policy changes.
[00:15:15.920] – Hilary
Yeah, it’s so nice to see that we’re backing out of all the craziness. I know our hospital, even in Phoenix, where we’re such a hot zone. I mean, we’re a hot zone period, but we’re starting to back out of it. And so that’s really nice to see and I hope it continues.
[00:15:30.230] – Katelyn
Yes. I’m curious to see what the hospital policies. I haven’t heard how they’ve changed or not. But yeah, again, I’m in New York and New York. We’ve been pretty steady, flat from Covid for months now. So.
[00:15:42.950] – Hilary
And you’re not in you’re pretty far from the city city.
[00:15:46.010] – Katelyn
I’m an hour and a half. It’s not that bad.
[00:15:48.140] – Hilary
But for Covid, that’s fairly far.
[00:15:50.780] – Katelyn
Well, our our county was hit pretty hard because a lot of people commute to the city from where we live. But that was the initial peak, right? And…
[00:15:59.890] – Hilary
Right. So that was like April?
[00:16:02.390] – Katelyn
February, March. We were early hits, right? Yeah.
[00:16:05.330] – Hilary
So anyway, it’s just so nice to see policies changing. And so if you’re early, I know I have a lot of readers that are like I’m due in February. What do you think? You know, things are changing. They told Katelyn he would basically never go to an ultrasound and then he was able to go. So that’s awesome.
[00:16:21.830] – Katelyn
Yeah, it’s it’s good news because we all need support and advocates on our behalf. And also your partner wants to be there. I know my husband has felt not as connected during this pregnancy than other ones because he’s usually gone to like as many appointments and ultrasounds as he could. So it’s good for them. They want to connect with their future child, you know?
[00:16:42.320] – Hilary
Yeah, it’s fun. That’s like the most tangible thing as an ultrasound for dads.
[00:16:46.640] – Katelyn
Yeah. I mean, my husband was so excited to see/hear the heartbeat today. He was like, I haven’t heard those like forever. And so it was really was really good for him.
[00:16:56.210] – Hilary
Yeah. So I bet a lot of you guys are feeling that same thing and so, so normal, so exciting. Well, I’d say next pregnancy, you can go to all of them, but it sounds like we’re done like the last little Fagan. “What’s up, Fagan’s? My uterus is closed.”
[00:17:10.040] – Katelyn
Yeah, I think seven kids is probably enough. Two sets of twins and wooh, yeah.
[00:17:16.160] – Hilary
Never say never.
[00:17:18.410] – Katelyn
I know. I know. I know.
[00:17:21.060] – Hilary
Oh thanks Katelyn.
[00:17:24.050] – Katelyn
[00:17:25.280] – Hilary
Guys, I hope she has her babies tonight. I’m going to link in the show notes a picture of her from Instagram today and you know me. I’ll have friends who are like Oh I’m so big. And I’m like, girl, you aren’t even big at all. And Katelyn , I’m like, yes, you are. That’s a good point. Although I think she’s big on all her babies. And I’ve said this to her, she knows it and she has big babies.
[00:17:43.640] – Hilary
So that’s fair. But now that she has twins in there, I’m just like, oh, wow. Like, at what point do people explode? But I just want to tell you guys that it is rough as you get towards the end of the pregnancy. And literally your one job is to incubate. If you have another child that you have to watch at home, see if you can get any help with that. You know, she’s have she has her other kids helping her out, although she has a crazy preschooler-ish, two year old-ish age that, you know, Sharpey and all those kind of things are happening as well.
[00:18:10.730] – Hilary
But she’s just trying to do the best she can. So just remember, you’re incubating at that point in time. Your baby really is getting so many good things from you. I’m so proud of people who make it all the way to the end of pregnancy. It really is the best thing for your baby.
[00:18:23.270] – Hilary
Thanks so much for joining us today. I hope we help smooth out a few of the smiles in your life. We drop an episode every Monday and we always appreciate it when you guys share and review. Until next time, we hope you have a tangle-free day.
Leave a Reply