This is intended a tongue in cheek post about the life of a labor nurse, I think that if any time an F-bomb is warranted, it’s during labor. Sometimes though…..
Being a labor nurse has its perks.
- I can offer to check my friend’s cervix when they are in labor (that usually ends in an offer).
- I get texts from friends wondering if they’re in labor.
- I get free belittling sessions by OB’s fairly frequently, heaven forbid they have to wait more than 2 pushes before the baby pops out!
- I sometimes find KY jelly on random parts of my body….
I’m just lucky.
But one of the other perks is hearing swearing in new and enjoyable ways rung through the hallways at my workplace.
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The F word can be used in several ways, it’s almost as good as an epidural!
- Sing it — nothing is better than an extended uuuuu sound!
- Certainly obtain a pitch that everyone in the room somehow feels is similar to nails on a chalkboard. You got it, that’s the one!
- Grab someone, anyone and any part of their body as you scream it in their face. Grabbed their boob? — That’s OK, they weren’t using it anyway. 🙂
- Say it repeatedly. For hours on end…. over and over.
- Use it in fun combinations. Holy mother @(_^!&!((^[email protected]_ — well, frankly, I am guessing the holy mother never did say such words, but if it helps you — by all means.
But, the reality of the situation, it’s the word that got you to labor and delivery.
But if it gets you out of it. Go for it.
Anyone have some earplugs? 🙂
A big thanks to my former bishop GP for giving me the idea for this post. 🙂
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